A Utah Mormon was seated next to an Irish Catholic on a flight back to States from London After the plane was airborne, drink orders were taken. The Irishman asked for a whiskey and a glass of Guinness, which were promptly brought and placed before him. The flight attendant then asked the Mormon if he would like a drink. He replied in disgust, "I'd rather be savagely raped by a dozen whores than let liquor touch my lips." The Irishman then handed his drinks back to the attendant and said, "Me too, I didn't know we had a choice.”
Garage Door. The boss walked into the office one morning not
knowing his zipper was down and his fly area wide open. His assistant walked up to
him and said, 'This morning when you left your house, did you close your garage
door?' The boss told her he knew he'd closed the garage door, and walked into
his office puzzled by the question.
As he finished his paperwork, he suddenly noticed his fly was open, and zipped it up. He then understood his assistant's question about his 'garage door.'
He headed out for a cup of coffee and paused by her desk to ask, 'When my
garage door was open, did you see my Jaguar parked in there?'
She smiled and said, 'No, I didn't. All I saw was an old minivan with two flat tires..
